now where ?

okay it's been a while since I rocked the keyboard over blog spot... an year for the records.

An year low on having and big on near (or rather far) misses. An year that comes with a failed acting stint. Now today, as always may be, high on potentiality of my guts but sort of low on the fluff they shall and should generate... Ah! nevermind.

The idea to get gung-ho on books is paying gradual dividends. Thanks to the cheap supply of the written word discarded by their first owners for them to be left on the mercy of the second ones...

Job eventually turned into a job. so it should only be done the way a job is done when the ones who matter stop considering your matter anymore...

O' cricket come save me.

Catching up with the Subtleties of Life

Indeed, it's all about subtleties and their composite mechanisms...because as it's been said, not generalizations but subtle exceptions makes all the difference - in one's behavior, nimbleness & degree of receptiveness... whoever might the be audience in whatever course of life...

May be I was mapping these subtleties, may be I was lost or may be I was just plain bewildered - whichver one lynches the reality bite for not putting up a post for good 7-8 months...

Things are marshalling ahead, though gradually, as they probably do in the real world, but I feel finding direction is the only thing that if done will take good care of the rest that shall follow...

What life sprungs for me in my march ahead Dr. Time will surely tell but for me I just need to focus on fixing the loopholes I so desperately want to... no matter how riped & old they are, they are to be tailored down to their most limited effect...

Topsy-turvy twists and turns, surprises and disheartening instants are the objective realities of life as I observe them. It will flip out a new feather, a new hope, a new challenge without giving you slightest shade of hint or sign. And shall also get down on you with near misses, brief passages of unconsciousness & at times by simply being a bitch...

Acting career is been launched officially, nobody should have any doubts now, I guess!!!

Let's see, how long it takes for me to pencilled into another project, another exposure... I personally feel that my first acting experience, effectually, gave me something; a more focused eye while going through the art pieces of other's around...

Work is been handled smoothly thus far, barring a glitch or two, which will be... overpowered soon... may be!

Lot's of cricket coming up which will eat a chunk of my evenings, besides socializing with the right guys & doing what not.

...and the bubble got busted and it busted really hard. Point for the future; look for the risk before making emotional investment. Nevertheless, all the trails met their showdown... be them good, bad, ugly or whatever!

I believe the time now begins to play safe at work by meeting most of the deadlines and of course, kick starting the career for which I've been striving from past 8 years generally, and 8 months particularly.

In the meantime yet another talk show for me. Though not one of the dearest priorities, but nonetheless the exposure it may give will further strengthen the belief that "Yes one day I will be there..."

Made few deletions today by getting rid of some excess baggage which I belief was necessary with no possible U-turn may be...

What else ??? oh yeah the usual procrastination...

Amid all the procrastination few effective things have materialised. One headache has gone pending for good few weeks, strategy for other is almost worked out and for rest we will play the system blame game...

Hah, things shaking-up a bit on personal front as well albeit a bit... at times how much of a difference few words can make... can shift the entire status quo upside down, inspires you to start believing again that may be this time it may clicque...

Patience is name of the game, you only comprehend the phrase once you're in it that gradual up-gradation is the key to fame...

Many things which I have to do, many ideas which are needed to be polished, executed and what not... yes every effort starts with a debut step but so is the stranglehold of present bottom lines that many ideas stayed ideas till now..

Notwithstanding above, some consideration given to physical outlook will may or may not improve the overall stature; perseverance permitting...

As I anticipated life just got busier in the later part of June - official commitments in more than one direction, the agony to affix available time with piled stack is already in the air, but then again its always been there with me... The 11th-hour hero when survival is at stake!

But in way its good professional commitments keeps me busy and don't let me be the pessimist I use to be once...

Things are moving slenderly, an upgradation from the stagnancy atleast but guess the extended drought have caused such a dent that invarialbly a lot of hopes get stitched whenever an affectionate hand becomes visible... Alas the irony of being empty-handed at the end of the day.

Hope! and some more... may be the only thing which may keeps one striving.

Next three weeks are important for more than one reason, quite interesting things coming up in the midst of packed professional front... but then again that's only one half of one's life...

...and the backwash it is, as it would be in the aftermath of a 4.30pm call yesterday... there was another call in the same time frame, same period of an year, in a different year 4 years ago... that one let it's symphony heard later on, this one wouldn't.


A sense of déjà vu they'll say...


Infact, those 22 m weren't difficult compared to the time succeeding the 22nd m till I-don't-know-when because you can only curtail your thought process to a limit by taking spiritual oaths to not let your mind stray off to difficult roads. But you can't practice it uniformly. There are bound to be moments when you'd be compelled enough and absorbed enough to scream WHHHYY ???

How does it feel when words from certain someone start killing instead of relishing as they used to once…

10 years pass by and Hache you are still unable to understand. Even though deep down a part of you knows why you had delayed leaving the excess baggage and buffoon’d yourself into trusting that may be this is it– earlier… Later it was tame emptiness and confined hibernation which trickled an old flame back again to extends which were to be brief, extreme.

But gave a lesson for life, aah always learned the hard way… but I daresay this one charged me a lot more than prior ones……indebted me till God knows when…

Life goes on, 25.01 is my real age my google age calculator updates...