Topsy-turvy twists and turns, surprises and disheartening instants are the objective realities of life as I observe them. It will flip out a new feather, a new hope, a new challenge without giving you slightest shade of hint or sign. And shall also get down on you with near misses, brief passages of unconsciousness & at times by simply being a bitch...

Acting career is been launched officially, nobody should have any doubts now, I guess!!!

Let's see, how long it takes for me to pencilled into another project, another exposure... I personally feel that my first acting experience, effectually, gave me something; a more focused eye while going through the art pieces of other's around...

Work is been handled smoothly thus far, barring a glitch or two, which will be... overpowered soon... may be!

Lot's of cricket coming up which will eat a chunk of my evenings, besides socializing with the right guys & doing what not.

...and the bubble got busted and it busted really hard. Point for the future; look for the risk before making emotional investment. Nevertheless, all the trails met their showdown... be them good, bad, ugly or whatever!

I believe the time now begins to play safe at work by meeting most of the deadlines and of course, kick starting the career for which I've been striving from past 8 years generally, and 8 months particularly.

In the meantime yet another talk show for me. Though not one of the dearest priorities, but nonetheless the exposure it may give will further strengthen the belief that "Yes one day I will be there..."

Made few deletions today by getting rid of some excess baggage which I belief was necessary with no possible U-turn may be...

What else ??? oh yeah the usual procrastination...

Amid all the procrastination few effective things have materialised. One headache has gone pending for good few weeks, strategy for other is almost worked out and for rest we will play the system blame game...

Hah, things shaking-up a bit on personal front as well albeit a bit... at times how much of a difference few words can make... can shift the entire status quo upside down, inspires you to start believing again that may be this time it may clicque...

Patience is name of the game, you only comprehend the phrase once you're in it that gradual up-gradation is the key to fame...

Many things which I have to do, many ideas which are needed to be polished, executed and what not... yes every effort starts with a debut step but so is the stranglehold of present bottom lines that many ideas stayed ideas till now..

Notwithstanding above, some consideration given to physical outlook will may or may not improve the overall stature; perseverance permitting...

As I anticipated life just got busier in the later part of June - official commitments in more than one direction, the agony to affix available time with piled stack is already in the air, but then again its always been there with me... The 11th-hour hero when survival is at stake!

But in way its good professional commitments keeps me busy and don't let me be the pessimist I use to be once...

Things are moving slenderly, an upgradation from the stagnancy atleast but guess the extended drought have caused such a dent that invarialbly a lot of hopes get stitched whenever an affectionate hand becomes visible... Alas the irony of being empty-handed at the end of the day.

Hope! and some more... may be the only thing which may keeps one striving.

Next three weeks are important for more than one reason, quite interesting things coming up in the midst of packed professional front... but then again that's only one half of one's life...

...and the backwash it is, as it would be in the aftermath of a 4.30pm call yesterday... there was another call in the same time frame, same period of an year, in a different year 4 years ago... that one let it's symphony heard later on, this one wouldn't.


A sense of déjà vu they'll say...


Infact, those 22 m weren't difficult compared to the time succeeding the 22nd m till I-don't-know-when because you can only curtail your thought process to a limit by taking spiritual oaths to not let your mind stray off to difficult roads. But you can't practice it uniformly. There are bound to be moments when you'd be compelled enough and absorbed enough to scream WHHHYY ???

How does it feel when words from certain someone start killing instead of relishing as they used to once…

10 years pass by and Hache you are still unable to understand. Even though deep down a part of you knows why you had delayed leaving the excess baggage and buffoon’d yourself into trusting that may be this is it– earlier… Later it was tame emptiness and confined hibernation which trickled an old flame back again to extends which were to be brief, extreme.

But gave a lesson for life, aah always learned the hard way… but I daresay this one charged me a lot more than prior ones……indebted me till God knows when…

Life goes on, 25.01 is my real age my google age calculator updates...

...and it got over - the magnetism finally stopped attracting - the pride finally dented to limits surpassing irreversibility and stargaze disappeared to surface the cruel practicality...

Took 6 years, a stretched forth amount of time, yet such an anti-climax... meant to be something lifelong, only to fallout after few rainy seasons....

This world is getting a dangerous place to live with every passing day, the fear to lose everything even after rendering every bit of oneself is heightening and what one may receives as a receipt ?life long durable teasing memories.... Why O Why...

...and then they say Guys can't be faithful, truthful and blah... I nullify them.

On the positive front, at least I'm getting rid of the excess baggage I was carrying - most of it I carried despite being rotten with a fear of being left empty handed if taken away...

Oh well, life moves on so would I, bring it on...

Why is it that whenever my birthday approaches, things starting to mess up; personally, socially, and at times even civically... 2004 & 05 witnessed severe strike in Karachi. Last year was an isolated one up there in Dubayy when I was almost done with Dream-Dubayy and gradually picking up pieces to leave as if waitng for the day of my execution...

Things are different this time on professional front, infact brighter as an optimist would put!

But... the personal front is isolated as ..ever may be. Guru is out of town, a fast buddy too! coupled with a sort of drought on feminine slope implies a complete recipe for a dull and sluggish birthday to comeby... not to mention the ultimate realization of a six year old chase, which in brief scathed practically...

This month of June is important for more than just the birth day event. The upcoming finale of 7.5 MOS of training is a month away testing me along with other 18 on quite afew fronts.... Am I prepared for that ? NO COMMENTS... Some optimisim I can gain from the fact that not every other member of my batch gave the PART-I examinations for IBP which is a monir plus... may be.

I must get the web site rolling....

How does it feels when an opportunity for which you have waited, strived and struggled for a best part of a dacade at long last makes signs of visibility... In breif it feels like a two-edged sword.

You know this is it - make or break - deliver or drum out. If came out at par, things would be as good as they could... But what if things didn't worked out, cofidence faltered, words jumbled, arousing a fudged impression...

It happens, may be with everybody. The opportunity to beat the cyclical mediocrity and montony of a common man's life does not passby everyone. It may frissons many of us in its own novel ways but the ability to sense it and clung onto it comes from within... but that's not it

The trail once being sensed multiplies it's magnitude as the length of time unfolds... quizzing one's strength to be persistently confident, agile, continously frame the engaged situtation to build mental defense if and when questioned in the said regard and apt use of the body language which speakers miles louder than words, especially in a larger sitting.

Life rarely happens in an organized manner.It always surprizes you with its twists and turns. Some times you are at par with your desired or present level of satisfaction and ready like ever to take up news roads and challenges. The other portions of times scattered in normalcy are, however, not so satisfising...

Life examines you in novel shapes. If you are canny enough to pick the storm before it ushers, you will survive... Or else one may lose...